Bats in the Belfrey

We lived at the condo for three and a half years, during which time we had three Halloweens come and go. The first year, we did nothing (went to see a movie, I believe). The second year, I got three faux pumpkins and carved them up, and set them on the porch area in front of our door, bought a large vat of Tootsie Rolls and waited for the trick or treaters. The day after Halloween, our Tootsie Roll supply had been depleted only by the ones that we had chowed down on, as there had not been a single trick or treater. Last year, we did the pumpkins again, but I got choice Hershey bite-sized candies, thinking that the kids would smell the CHOCOLATE and be enticed to knock on our door. We had ONE trick or treater, a 13-14 year old kid dressed in a hoodie and carrying a back pack. Pah-thet-ick.

So I had high hopes for this year when October rolled around, and many many many homes in the neighbourhood pulled out elaborate Halloween themed decorations with everything from creepy spider webs with gigantic spiders to full-on haunted forest set-ups with mummies and monsters. Not wanting to get my hopes up, I resolved to keep things modest and not decorate until the day of (my plans were also largely dictated by the horribly time consuming business law course I was enrolled in at the time). I bought a large real pumpkin and snagged four more faux pumpkins on clearance from Michael's. After I finished up my final for my class, I started carving the faux pumpkins. BEHOLD

The kitty face and bat cave are the pumpkins that I carved two years ago--the bat cave hasn't held up very well, and there's now only one bat left and I had to staple his wing back on.

Then on the 29th, I decided we didn't have enough real pumpkins and that I really wanted the faux spider web stuff to put on the porch and that we just had to have it, so I drug John around to various places for more pumpkins and webbing. Rant: Vons wanted $15 for a pumpkin that was a good bit smaller than the $3.54 pumpkin I snagged at WinCo a week before. F-them! So we got some slightly smaller pumpkins at Trader Joes for $3.49 each.

Then I got to thinking about how long our driveway is, and that the incline probably isn't that enticing to little kids, and the fact that we don't really have a lighted path up to the house and the stairs leading up from the driveway are kind of sloppy and irregular and that since we're homeowners, we are not LIABLE for injuries. So I convinced John that we needed to light the path, and ran over to a Dollar Tree to look for something to do just that. I picked up (10) clear glass cylinder vases, took them home, and painted Halloween-type silhouettes on them using black acrylic paint. I added a cup of rock salt to keep them from slipping down the hill, and used large tealight candles. Behold! I also decided that 10-vases wouldn't be enough to light the path, so I picked up some brown sacks and drew some silhouettes on them using black permanent marker, as well. For extra weight, I added a cup of rock salt and used flameless battery-powered "candles." Behold! Saturday was a busy busy day, as we went to a woodworking trade show out in Costa Mesa (about 60ish miles) and then to Ikea in Costa Mesa (to return some broken/unneeded items that were purchased on our last trip). I still hadn't carved the real pumpkins and put out the spider webbing (John needed to clean leaves off the driveway first, and he did it in the morning before we left for Costa Mesa). So as soon as we got home, I got busy threading the spider webbing on nails and staples and hooks that the previous owner of the house had left. BEHOLD!

We have a portal to (hell) the crawl space under the house, so I put webbing there, too. Behold!John helped me put out some more staked solar lights we purchased several months ago, but never bothered to put out.

Then I started putting out the various votives, luminaries and faux pumpkins. BEHOLD!

I quickly cleaned and carved the real pumpkins. I had high hopes that John and Josh would like to relive their childhood glory days and get in on the carving but, alas, they refused and each went off to play whatever video games they wanted. :o( Woe was me.

I didn't have time to do something fancy and cool like I'd done in the past, so I settled with traditionally carved faces. Behold! John had been using the power drill to put out more solar-powered light stakes along the driveway, so I snagged the drill and "carved" the final large pumpkin. Behold!

There was one more real pumpkin that I got a chance to carve, but it looks like I didn't get a picture of it. So I guess I'll have to say that it was THE BEST PUMPKIN CARVING ever and you'll just have to imagine how AWESOME it was and that it made that pathetic face look even more pathetic.

While I was getting everything ready, I could hear the sugar-fueled laughter of kids a few streets over, and I got excited that we'd FINALLY have trick or treaters (I cannot really explain my desire for trick or treaters. I swear it's not evil witch-like from Hansel and Gretel. I just like the thought of kids getting hopped up on candy and terrorizing their parents).

After I was satisfied enough that we had adequately lighted the pathway so as to limit our liability, John and I enjoyed a nice Costco pizza and watched Let the Right One In as we waited for the trick or treaters.

And we waited.

The whole freaking night, we had FOUR trick or treaters. The first two were 12-13 years old and had a back pack for candy (WTH is it with teenagers and backpacks!?). The second two were a little more appropriately aged 7-8 year olds, and for their effort of trudging up the drive way, they got a nice handfull of Almond Joys and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and Whoppers.

Lessons Learned:

• Draw your silhouettes on the side of the paper bag that does not have the seam
• Use white paper bags rather than Kraft paper bags, as they'll create more light
• Bees are attracted to flames just as much as moths, and make interesting encaustic-esque sculptures when they get too close to the flame.
• Power drills are awesome pumpkin carvers, but they might quite a bit of mess (Linda Blair would've been proud). I recommend using them outside *or* cleaning up IMMEDIATELY as pumpkin guts practically fuse to granite when they're dry.
• Glass vases are very easily painted with acrylic paints. I suppose that if I wanted to keep the paint on them, I could spray them with clear spray paint. As it is, I think I'll reuse them for other things, so I'll just scape off the paint.
• I need to start earlier!
• Finally, the most important lesson learn: just because you build it doesn't mean they'll come. :o(